Chixe

I hope I don't turn out like my mom...

I KNOW I'll more than likely turn out like my dad... we tend to think too much alike for me not to.

Hmmm...I hope I inherit traits, but I don't know that I want to be them. You know?

Yeah, I don't want to end up like my parents... and I try really hard not to make the same mistakes.

I don't really know my biological dad, however I've had a few step dads... they were pretty sucky.

My mom has her moments but for the most part, she's wacky.

After being with my girl for 5 years we still hold hands, talk and do all the fun and squishy relationship and love stuff.

My grand parents were married over 40 years (before my grandfather died). They were very happy and in love.

Relationships don't seem to last like that anymore. Back then, people didn't mess around. They laid out some ground rules for the relationship, they both respected things and all was well.

I think for a marriage or any relationship to last, you need communication, love, trust and respect.

*rubs head

Wow, I went off on a tangent... sorry about that... hehe... anyway, I do not want to end up like my parents... grand parents yes. They rock.

(This is a rough topic, so I'll keep this brief)

My parents are no longer together, nor have they been since I was in 5th grade. That was, and still lingers, as a major point in my life. It was a clean split and they both promised to never put myself or my brother in the middle of things and they didn't.

Though there's a lot of crap that's gone down since that is not relevant to this conversation but I'll just say my mom has the right outlook on life. While my dad put work in front of all things, including us. And has tried to buy his way back in.

As a result, I see my mom about once a month or two, my dad, maybe a handful of times a year usually at major holidays. Despite them both living about 2 hours from me.

I understand that Ryan. I can see where I'm a lot like my dad, but I keep fighting it because, well...I don't want to be like him. We don't get along, and I'm not sure if that's because we're so much alike or if he really is a dick, and so am I.

Like everyone else, my parents have faults. There are aspects of their relationship that I would prefer were different in my own marriage (when I do get married that is) but they are still together and they still participate in activities together; they enjoy their grandchildren together. While recognizing marriage is never easy and always difficult, I think the most important thing they pass on to me is perserverence in their marriage.

As an individual, I get some traits from each of my parents but in whole are very different from them. The other day, my cousin said I sounded "just like my Mom" when I said something and immediately this cloud kind of came over me. I said, "Don't say that!" but in reality, I guess it's not TOO bad. :) She's a strong woman, and I'd think that's not the worst characteristic of the lot, if anything were to be passed on.

I don't want to be my parents, either, because that's a scary thought, but relationship-wise, my family seems to do pretty well. My parents are celebrating their 35th wedding anniversary in June and my grandparents are celebrating their 60th (!!)... my grandfather still holds my grandmother's hand, still tells her she's the most beautiful woman she's ever seen, and still kisses her constantly. They use pet names, spend a lot of time together, and are clearly still in love. It's adorable. And that's something I'd definitely love to have.

I have already sort of "turned out," being sixteen years into my marriage. Early on, many of my relationship choices were pretty direct reactions to the primary relationship I observed -- my parents. That's probably typical. Many choices people make have to do with avoiding what you thought went wrong with your parents: if your dad was harsh, you might choose a man who's gentle. If your mom was intrusive, you might choose a woman who gives you space. If your parents seemed bored by each other, you might think before marrying someone who has little in common with you.

But as you get older, and you see how difficult it is to make those initial choices work through all the growth and change people experience, you also realize that your parents' marriage is not yours to criticize or condemn and, in fact, to see that marriage is a difficult enterprise to keep going. I think you feel more compassionate about what your parents have done, and you see how things could have turned out as they did, because you have encountered some of the difficulties they did yourself and the answers were not easy or painless, not even after you tried to avoid their mistakes. Being with someone for the long haul is not as easy or painless as you thought back when you were 24 and picking a mate.

And so although I can track some things in my parents' marriage to some decisions I've made about my own, I also think their marriage belongs to them and has nothing to do with me anymore. It is enough to just love them, admire them for what is truly admirable, forgive them for the mistakes they made, and wish them well. And to make my own marriage live and breathe and work.

This is kind of a tough question. I think, when we're kids, we all want to grow up to be like our parents at some point. But as we grow older and they slowly slide off that pedestal, we realize that they aren't as perfect as we thought.

In the end, I hope I can say I inherited certain traits: my mother's thoughtfulness and warmth, my father's level-headed-ness and super wondermous brain power. :)

I'd like to think I'm balanced, equal portions of both, with a healthy dose of originality mixed in.

It's kind of sad, but I don't really know my parents well enough to wonder or guess if I inherited any traits from them. I know that I wish I had my mom's strength, but I'm not really sure if it's strength or if it's...just the inability to deal or want to deal with situations.

The more you hope and try, the more likely you're going to end up being like your parents. That's Murphy's Law for you.

It's hard to say you won't be like your parents especially if they were there being the major influence in your life (even if they are divorced or seperated).

The thing is, I know I already like my parents. I have their traits, habits and their quirks. But in knowing that I already like my parents, I don't want to make the same mistakes they made because of what they are or can do.

Though they are together, they too lost that spark. Mind you though that this happens to everyone unless they have something special going for them. So I don't think it's that bad a deal. People either live with it or don't. That's the hard truth about relationships that last that long.

I might not be able to stop being like my parents. But at least I'll do everything in my power to learn from their mistakes and make sure I don't take the same road they took.

My mom can be incredibly short-sighted and set in her ways. I can tell she's angry she's not living the life she wanted because her mom guilted her into staying in her small hometown and working locally. She's been married four times and pretty much takes her spare time to pester me about not giving her kids and being gay. Oh, and catching the Holy Ghost in tent revivals and backwater churches.

My dad went from being a government scientist to a construction worker to a Muslim ascetic who now wanders the country wherever Allah takes him.

If there's a deity in the stratosphere, I seriously hope I don't turn out like them.

I think a lot of people have the mindset that they don't want to turn out to be like their parents. Some try to avoid it to the extreme. Then, one day you look in the mirror, or you are talking to your own child, or you are involved in an activity. And, you either see yourself acting like they would, or you hear yourself sounding like them.

It is inevitable. There will be at least one instance, one moment of revelation.

My parents are awesome I just don't want to turn out like my one grandmother, the one that came to my first graduation event this evening, the one I had to sit through dinner with while she complained incessantly that I wasn't participating at the large f--k-zoo in the park on Thursday, the one who will be at my other graduation event tomorrow morning and who I am hoping gets a migraine and has to stay in the hotel so I do not have to listen to her ask me what I am wearing underneath the grad gown and complain because it is not what she would think one should wear.

Lordy, I have a headache.

I feel better now.

I would love to be like my parents, they are much more tolerant than I. Except for an obsession with twin-sets my mother is pretty awesome as well as smart and my father is just the most decent person I know.

I know this is contradicting, but:

(a) I want to be like my Mum. She's strong and she's courageous, despite the fact that my father walked out on her. And she's diligent in bringing up my sister and I. And she's patient with us. But the most important thing is that, she doesn't teach us to HATE our father. She doesn't bad-mouth him but of course, we realized what was going on when we got older; YET

(b) I don't want to be like my Mum because I don't fancy the idea of sleeping by myself on a cold King bed every night, or NOT having someone to depend on, to share with, to laugh or cry with, to see the kids grow up together with.

Seriously, I think I have this phobia of getting married because I think about point (b) too much. I have a loving boyfriend, but I'm not sure whether I'd marry him if/when he asks *shrugs*

My parents are both awesome, and I'd be extremely proud to turn out like them.

Ditto to what Mike said!

Does anyone ever stop and think- "damn, I am turning out just like my parents"?

I am very much like my parents were, and very proud to be so similar to them.

I have the same smile and laugh as my mother had, and I look like both of my parents (I have my father's eyes and nose). I have many of their mannerisms, which I wouldn't change for the world...those very traits keep them alive, through me.

I would be consider myself a success if I turn out to be like my parents.

According to my grandfather the secrets:

Don't marry the girl you can imagine spending the rest of your life with, but marry the one you can't imagine spending the rest of your life without.

Also, marriage isn't 50/50. If you are both expecting to be giving half the time and getting half the time, you might overlap. You have to both expect to give 100% of the time, that way you will both be getting a lot.

I hope I don't turn out like anyone, but yes, I'd be content with simply not sharing any traits with either of my parents.

Growing up (LOL, to find myself saying that is just funny) I can vividly recall reflecting on my parents rules and perceived injustices and swearing up and down how *I* would be different when I was "old" and had kids.

Well, at the ripe old age of 35 I look back at those times and chuckle. Of course I am not going to let my son do the things that I wanted to do. Being able to look through the glasses of experience I know now that my parents were only doing what was best for me.

And while the rose colored glasses of innocence made these injustices seem worse than many war crimes at the age of 16, time has given me the clarity needed to be, well just like my parents in some regards.